The institution of marriage has been the epicenter of all cultures in the world for centuries now. In medieval times, marriage was the bond that brought union between two kingdoms, both in the western and the African setting. It is the link that brought about the genesis of families and the mixture of the human population such that it is now possible to find a Chinese married to an African.
Almost all religions in the world honor holy matrimony, stating that it remains between two people. Well, some might allow several people, but one common thing is to stay faithful to the chosen. The institution, however, was tainted by the human nature of wanting more than we have, which gives rise to infidelity. And in this piece, we shall be looking into the signs your husband is cheating with a coworker. So keep reading for 10 signs that your husband is cheating on you at work:
1. Your Husband Works Longer than Usual
The number one sign that your husband is cheating at work is when they are spending longer hours at work. But this is not always a confirmation as some jobs require their staff to stay longer working hours or even stay the night. And in such a case, he will have informed you in advance and also show you proof of the same. But if he just goes ahead and starts staying at work late without evidence, he must be up to no good and is probably cheating at work.
2. He Has Regular Impromptu Business Trips
Certain careers have staff members that are always on the move. Today they are in Japan, and tomorrow they are in Morocco closing a deal with a new client. If you start dating such a man while they are in the lower ranks of such a job, you kind of know that the eventuality of their career progressing is a possibility. So once you get married, and he gets a promotion and starts moving around on business trips well and good. This is because the promotion would justify these business trips.
How your husband behaves while they are on these trips will speak volumes. You can quickly tell he is faithful because he will always keep you in the loop by calling home once he lands, sending pictures, and sharing his whereabouts when he is on a trip. But if he says nothing and goes MIA, red flags start waving. Another indicator is if the business trips become too often and you have no proof that he is going.
3. He Dresses Up For Work
There is no event at work, but your husband starts dressing up, why? So as not to stir up unnecessary drama, you let it pass because it is a good image on you too. As a wife, it is your pride and joy when he is smart. But be cautious, he might be using this to impress someone other than you. Warning signs of emotional affairs at work is if he does not want your input in what he should wear. Instead, he sticks to the preferences the other woman has for him and masks them as his own. This might not be a sure sign, but if he is doing things he hated before out of the blues, investigate. There is probably someone behind the change.
4. His Car Smells Weird
Being married to a man undoubtfully means that you get accustomed to his scent as well as the things he owns, including his car. In retrospect, his vehicle is kind of yours since you are in a marriage. So much so, when there is a new smell in the car, you will at once pick up on it. At first, you might brush it off or start looking for any strange thing that might be omitting that smell, and you find nothing. When you cannot find anything tangible, you should at once ask him about it.
Most times, he will brush it off with a lame excuse that he is using a new air freshener or the car wash attendant changed detergent. And unfortunately, you might fall for that since they are both possibilities. You should, therefore, watch his body language when he is giving you an answer. If he seems fidgety looking concern about the question, he is probably guilty of something. And cheating may be on that list.
5. He Skips Mentioning a Particular Colleague
People talk about people all the time. The best topics revolve around people. What they did, said or wore is a constant topic shared between married couples. So much so, it is not new if your man shares about how the secretary keeps messing up the mail or the finance director rumors of being fired. But what should worry you is if he all of a sudden avoids talking about a particular member of staff, particularly a female coworker. They avoid the topic because they do not want to disclose any info that may implicate them. When you notice that he is getting uncomfortable or defensive when you bring her up, he might be cheating on you with her.
6. He Continually Talks About a Specific Coworker
The other extreme of avoiding to talk about a coworker he is having an affair with is that he will continuously talk about her. If his speech becomes She did this, she did that, take note. Something might be going on. When we are fond of someone or something, we will talk about it almost every chance we get. That means if you realize that he keeps telling you about what she wore today, what she ate, and other things, he might have taken an interest in her. Such information will only be realized by someone who pays attention. And since he continuously voices her daily things, he is then paying more attention to her. This here is one of the signs husband likes coworker.
Is Flirting Cheating? – 6 Signs That Flirting Has Gone Too Far.
7. You Can Never Stop Over The Office
You indeed have no business always stopping over at his office, but that does not mean that a once in a while stop is prohibited. And if you are in this predicament that he forbids you to visit him there, know that something is off. Either he lied to his boss, he is not married or is hiding you from a coworker he has a thing for. Well, the only thing to do here is to ask him why you cannot stop by. And if the reason makes sense, which is highly unlikely, then stay away. Otherwise, head down to the office to drop off lunch as a surprise and see how he reacts. You will immediately pick up on a lie on how he is acting upon your arrival.
8. You Are Never Taken To Office Events
Most offices nowadays hold events like product launches and seasonal parties such as Christmas parties. And most times they allow their staff members to bring a plus one. Most husbands take their wives and wives their husbands to celebrate the company’s success. But if you have never been invited to one, try figure out why. Most times, he will tell you there is a party but will not even bring up the possibility of welcoming you as his plus one. He might even clearly voice out that it is not a plus one party and will even hide the invite sent to him and tell you by word of mouth. This here is a sure indication that he is hiding something from you. And sometimes he might be taking someone else in your place, especially if none of his colleagues have met you.
9. You Heard Office Gossip
Gossip has a way of maneuvering beyond walls and spread far and wide and gets to the staff’s family members. As aforementioned, people talk about people. This means that if you have befriended a wife of your husband’s colleague and she tells you of a rumor of a possible affair, take note. Sometimes the rumor monger might know the whole truth, but in the effort to ease the blow, they will talk in the third person, trying to be indirect. For instance, they may say, “I heard the secretary is sleeping with one of the managers.” knowing very well that your husband is one of the managers in the company. She then hints at the possibility but does not confirm it for you. Regardless, you must then get to the bottom of things by asking your husband.
10. He is Always on Phone or Online for Work
If you realize that your hubby has become fond of his phone or laptop after work in the name he is working and he hides it from you, something might be off. There might be some truth to this if he works in a field where secrecy is of high regard. But if this is not the case, beware. When you take a closer look, and you realize that he is instead on social media platforms speaking to a particular female colleague, they might be having an affair. Infidelity coworker most times happens this way.
Possible Coping Methods To a Cheating Husband
- Confirm your allegations
If you confirm signs husband is cheating at work above, you must then proceed to confront your husband about it. Be firm and calm when asking him and keep an eye on his body language while he listens and answers. If it is true, take a step back and give yourself time to absorb it in and know what to do moving forward. If it is false, talk it out with your significant other.
- Voice it out
If your suspicions were not confirmed, calmly explain to your husband why you thought he was cheating. Voice out his behaviors and get to the bottom of each sign that indicated he was unfaithful. And communicate what you would like him to change from then on.
- Use a spy app
Sometimes you might not be delighted with the answers you got after the confrontation, and your gut confirms this to you. Fret not; there is more than one way to catch a thief. With modern tech, you can use a spy app to monitor their online and offline activities.
Cheating is never a good thing; there is never a happy ending in such scenarios. Both the cheater and the cheated on suffer emotionally. And sometimes it affects other parties like children. But if it happens to you, it is not the end of the world. You can heal from this. Remember, the end of something is the beginning of another, so be optimistic.
Note, if he often goes to lunch with her, this is the clearest sign of their intimacy.
My husband behaves differently around one particular colleague, for example, in her presence he seems to be imperceptibly patronizing her. I thought it was just being polite, but now I realize that it’s not true(