No one wants their girlfriend cheating on them, but if you see signs of a cheating girlfriend, it raises suspicions. This guide will help you know what you should do to catch your girlfriend in the act.
How to Tell If Your Girlfriend Is Cheating?
No matter how well a cheater tries to cover their tracks, there are several ways how to know if your girl is cheating. You may see the answer by looking at the common characteristics of a cheating woman. Here are some ways to know if your girlfriend is cheating.
She's Suddenly Improving Her Appearance
Is your girlfriend spending half her paycheck on makeup and exercising more than usual? Is she buying fancy dresses when she isn't going on a date with you? Sometimes, a person has the urge to improve themselves. However, it could also be a sign that she's trying to impress someone new. If you notice she's putting much more effort into her appearance but still is looking the same around you, it could be a sign of cheating.
She Is Suddenly Secretive
Look, we all have our secrets, but trust is what makes a relationship work. Is she cheating if she suddenly hides away when she's on the phone or goes somewhere and doesn't tell you where? This could be a sign of cheating.
The Relationship Is on the Rocks
While it definitely doesn't excuse it, many cheating cases come from a poor relationship. If you two have been arguing like a couple twice your age, or if your girlfriend is afraid to take it to the next level, this could be a sign of a bad relationship.
Less (Or More) Intimacy
If your girlfriend is doing the dirty deed with others, she is less likely to do it with you. While there are other causes of a low sex drive, combined with the other reasons, she may be cheating. That said, some girlfriends are more in the mood after doing it with others, so she may be more sexually active in some situations.
Your Finances Have Changed
Some girlfriends are thrifty even in their affairs. However, most are buying new clothes, going out to fancy dinners, and traveling long distances to have an affair. If you're noticing that your girlfriend suddenly can't pay the bills, or if you share a bank account and see some weird charges, well, as they say, money talks.
She Is “At Work” or “With Her Friends”
Your girlfriend has been away from home a lot more, and the reason tends to be “Extended working hours” or “I'm going on a night out with the girls”. You might ask, “Is she cheating on me?” Overtime is definitely possible. Girls deserve to have a little fun alone from time to time, but if she's not answering her phone while with friends or if you're driving by her work and don't see her car, this could be a total lie.
Just a Hunch
Sometimes, you may not have any hard evidence that she's cheating on you. There's something off, but put your finger on it. Obviously, your gut is not definitive evidence. However, it can be a springboard to help you investigate further.
What To Do If You Think Your Girlfriend Cheated on You
If you're saying, “I think my girlfriend is cheating on me,” then what's your next move? Why not start with:
Identifying All the Signs of Her Infidelity
The first question you should ask is, “Why do you think this?” Open that notepad on your phone and write down why you think she's cheating. Start with the reasons listed above, if applicable, or find odd behaviors, too. If you see multiple signs, this is a strong reason that she may be cheating.
What Questions Should I Ask?
The best way how to find out if your girlfriend is cheating is to ask questions. While you may not like treating your girlfriend like a game of 20 questions, asking the following questions can help confirm or dispel your suspicions.
“Do You Feel Like Taking It to the Next Step?”
If you've been dating for a while, ask her if you want to take it to the next step. This can include moving in, getting engaged, or other large commitments. If your girlfriend is cheating, she may give excuses such as “I'm not ready” or dodge the question. If you two have only gotten together recently, we get why she may say this. However, this can be a red flag if you've been together for a while!
“I Knew Someone Who Cheated Once”
Bring up an anecdote. It can be from work or something you've made up as long as you're a good storyteller. Either way, see how she reacts. This can be a red flag if she seems to take the cheater's side a bit or seems too eager to condemn it.
“Could I See Your Phone?”
If you want to catch her cheating, see her phone activity. We aren't saying you should grab her phone and start looking, but you need to use it quickly. If she outright refuses or says something akin to “Let me read my messages first,” she may be hiding something or trying to delete the evidence.
“How Did You Give Yourself Permission?”
If you do get her to admit she's cheating, you'll want to figure out why she did it. One question to ask her is how she justified cheating on you. What went through her head to make her think, “Oh, this is okay?” Did she feel any guilt afterward? What made her keep coming back?
Pressing her on why she did what she did can help you understand a cheater's mindset. Every cheater has their own way of justifying their actions. By confronting her and asking the right questions, be able to learn the truth.
Time to Confront Her!
So you have gathered evidence that your girlfriend is cheating. You may think the best move is to confront her ASAP and do it angrily. Not so fast. There is an ideal method for doing this that will give you the best answer. The circumstances should be the following:
- You're in a private place. Doing it in the middle of a cafe is never a good idea.
- Both of you are in a calm, neutral mood. If emotions are running high, this can lead to a shouting match instead of getting to the truth.
- You have the evidence ready. If you're stumbling on your reasons, you'll be in trouble.
- You've practiced presenting your case reasonably and one that does not sound accusatory.
Doing these things can increase your chances of your girlfriend admitting to it. Not doing any of them can lead to your girlfriend getting upset and making you out to be the villain. That said, some girlfriends will still deny everything, so be sure that you have hard evidence, such as text messages, photo evidence, or anything else she'll have a hard time denying. Now, let's look at how to catch a cheating girlfriend.
How To Catch a Cheating Girlfriend: A Definitive Guide
Catching Her Cheating typically refers to uncovering evidence that a woman is engaging in a romantic or sexual relationship with someone else, outside of her current committed relationship:
Method 1: Catch Her Cheating on Her Phone
Her phone most likely contains a treasure trove of evidence. However, that password protection screen and her using hidden apps and accounts can trip you up. Here's how you will get past this.
Use iCloud Spying
Does your girlfriend have an iPhone? Does she use iCloud? Do you know, or is it easy to guess her credentials?
Then, good news! That's all you need. If you log into her iCloud, you will see her activities, read iMessages, and more. Also, it is possible to track an iPhone this way.
Check the Trash Can on Her Android
What if your girlfriend is on the Android team? Then she may have forgotten to empty her trash bin or didn't set it so that content is deleted permanently. If you log into her phone, go to Storage, and then you should see the Trash folder. Suppose you see deleted photos, videos, or other damning content, then jackpot.
Monitor Her Social Media and Create Fakes If Needed
Social media is a valuable tool for catching girlfriend cheating. Log into her profile and check her DMs. If you can't, then you'll still see what posts she likes or who she's following.
If needed, create a fake profile if she has a private profile to see what she's doing or see posts she may have hidden from you.
A keylogger is software that records keystrokes. If you install one on your girlfriend's phone or a shared PC, you will be able to record her conversations or login information. This can track where she's been going and perhaps what people she's been talking to as well. Many spy apps have keyloggers, allowing for another valuable tool when tracking your girlfriend.
Install a Spy App on Her Phone
Spy apps and other tracking apps for couples help you catch a cheater in the act. One such app, Cocospy, hides in the background and tells you who your girlfriend is texting, what she's doing on social media, what apps she's using, and even see her location.
Despite this app being marketed towards parents who want to track their children, many couples use Cocospy to see if their partner is cheating. It's discreet and leaves no stone unturned. Even if your girlfriend is someone who likes to delete her messages, you will still see them via the dashboard and receive real-time alerts.
Cocospy does require a subscription and for you to have access to her phone or iCloud. But once it's on her phone, you'll have definitive proof she is cheating. Check out several Cocospy app reviews to see how it's helped people like you.
Listen to Her Conversations on the Phone
Several apps let you listen to cell phone conversations. If your girlfriend is talking on the phone a lot and is avoiding you while doing it, these apps can help you learn who she is talking to. This step especially applies if you see her call logs and notice that she is talking to a mysterious contact a lot more than she is talking to you.
Tracking Her Phone's Location History
If your girlfriend claims she's staying late at work, using a spy app or logging into her iCloud or Google account will tell you where she really is. If she's miles away from her workplace and at someone's residence, that's a wrap.
Getting Incognito Browser History Data
Sometimes, your girlfriend will search in incognito mode, leaving no trace of her data. However, you will still see all her activities if you have a spy app.
If she's using her PC, search for “command prompt”, then right-click on it and select “Run as administrator. Then type “ipconfig /displaydns” (without quotation marks) and hit enter.
Method 2: Catch Her Cheating by a Surprise Visit
Do you suspect that she's cheating when you're not around? Does the bed smell funky, or is she going through more food than usual? Tell her that you have a business trip or another reason why you need to head out for the day. Hide somewhere where you can see the house, and when you see someone pull in, introduce yourself!
Method 3: Use Video Surveillance
Sometimes, you need to go a bit old school. Install cameras around the house or in her car. Many WiFi cameras online disguise themselves as ordinary objects, such as flash drives or wall outlets. Using these, you'll catch her in the act in real time!
Method 4: Use Outside Help
If you suspect your girlfriend is cheating, but she's slick at dodging all your methods, it's time to get outside help. Hiring a private investigator (or a friend who's good at blending in) may be your solution. This method is pricey, but a highly-rated private eye can give you the desired results.
Method 5: Use Your Words
Finally, use direct dialogue to catch your girlfriend in the act. We mentioned questions you could ask to catch her in the act. Besides these questions, get down to the truth via basic discussions.
She's bound to drop a contradiction in there somewhere. If you've noticed that she's changing her story from seeing her friends to doing errands, then latch onto this contradiction. Also, play the guilt trip card. Making her feel bad about cheating can get her to confess.
If I Can Prove She's Cheating, Should I Stay?
If you've answered the question, “Is my girlfriend cheating?” and the answer was a resounding “Yes!” then is it worth it to stay?
It all depends on the severity of the cheating. For example, your girlfriend having sex with someone multiple times behind your back can have more of an impact than her having an emotional affair, which is when a person is emotionally cheating on you by being more intimate with someone else but not necessarily doing it physically.
In minor cases, it can be fixable. Not by saying, “I'm cheating on my girlfriend to get back at her,” but instead by seeking help via counseling. There may be underlying issues at play, such as a lack of intimacy or personal problems. If you tackle these problems, you come out of the relationship stronger.
However, this is only sometimes the case. If you feel that all trust has been shattered and the relationship is going south, to begin with, it may be time to call it quits. Think of your relationship like a car. You won't toss your vehicle because of a fender-bender that knocks out a light. However, if your car is totaled and under repair, it is more trouble than it's worth (and even after it's fixed, it never works the same); it's time to say your goodbyes.
No matter what you choose, letting go is challenging, and so is repairing the broken pieces. We hope this article was helpful for you and that you confront your cheating girlfriend.